


strange what desire will make the foolish do

by yellowhalcyon



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood and Injury, Blow Jobs, Demon Shane Madej, Grinding, Guardian Spirit Ryan Bergara, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, mild body horror
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-13
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-11-16 17:12:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18098597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yellowhalcyon/pseuds/yellowhalcyon
Summary: Ryan rescues a demon trapped in a shrine and, while recovering in his house, they become friends.





	strange what desire will make the foolish do

**Author's Note:**

> this is kinda like the director's cut version, cos i went through and added in a few extra bits, so if you've read it before, feel free to read it again for the same shit now with more glitter
> 
> This was highly inspired by [from-one-fandom-to-the-other](https://from-one-fandom-to-the-other.tumblr.com/)’s wonderful pieces of artwork right [here](https://yellowhalcyon.tumblr.com/post/183621388990/from-one-fandom-to-the-other-the-world-was-on) & [here](https://yellowhalcyon.tumblr.com/post/183621897630/from-one-fandom-to-the-other-falling-from) ~~, who I realise now also inspired a sequel fic idea to[my other shyan fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16317494?view_full_work=true) with [this art](https://yellowhalcyon.tumblr.com/post/186722857539/from-one-fandom-to-the-other-he-knew-what-you).~~ She's just got some really excellent art, is what I’m tryna say
> 
> And unfortunately i know that she's deleted her tumblr now, but it's encouraging me to add more content in the fandom

From as long as he could remember, there had always been a saying that when a spirit returned to their home, it would signal the end of their journey. Ryan never believed this, however. He’d lost and re-found his home multiple times over the centuries, travelling the whole world several ways over.

But mostly, he didn’t want to believe this because it seemed rather unfair to find somewhere to belong and then for everything to come to an end. If it were true, he hoped he would find something worth the sacrifice.

¬

Ryan found the soul right where he sensed he needed to look. In all honesty, it was kind of hard to miss and their presence here appeared to have upset the sky. Dark clouds spiralled around above them both and he spied a storm in the distance.

Strung up against the tree, cloth had been pulled tight against their body, cutting into the flesh in some places. A piece went across their eyes and another dug into their mouth, keeping it open. Blood stained their lips. They still wore some clothes underneath, although Ryan doubted that they’d be salvageable. He had clothes at home, though, which should fit this one. If not, he could always buy them. Several pieces wrapped tightly around their head, arms, and torso, reminiscent of spiderwebs.

A distinct white piece of cloth attached to their stomach flapped in the wind. Ryan read the words scribbled on top:

_KEEP OFF_

_IF YOU KNOW WHAT’S GOOD FOR YOU_

Ryan hadn’t been back to this country in years and yet within a few days of settling in, he’d already found a soul strung up for punishment. It didn’t really matter why they were here, he had sensed their pain and decided to help them nonetheless.

Calmly, he approached their back where the bandages met the tree. He doubted this one could hear him right now; the pain would be too strong for that. A few tears in the fabric indicated someone else had tried to cut them free earlier. Maybe they’d spotted the message last minute and didn’t have any means to protect themselves.

Ryan would be fine. Even if not, he worked too fast for whatever demon had made it their mission to string up this one to rot to notice him in time. Upon the spoken word, he moved a glowing hand down and burnt away most of the thinner threads. He got out his knife for the stronger trunk of bandages in the middle, the blade already enchanted so it required no extra magic. It was a bit awkward to cut into with how their body got in the way, Ryan almost couldn’t reach to the centre to cut it.

He had to pause when he first touched them, however, since they cried out something awful as much the cloth in their mouth would allow. Ryan apologised even though he still knew they couldn’t hear. He had figured the bandages would have been dosed in something to curse them and make everything that came in contact with their skin burn like fire.

Once free, Ryan slowly lowered their body down. He placed a hand over their chest to stem the burning sensation before lifting them up over his shoulders. Nonetheless, they groaned all the while and during the whole journey back to his house, like a dying animal not yet road kill.

Apparently, his work had done nothing to appease the sky as when he ascended the stone steps up to the large yard of his home, the bandaged soul flung over his shoulders, a crack of lightning illuminated the forest in the distance. Ryan sighed but alas he had made it back to shelter in time for the rain at least.

A slightly difficult challenge to slide his house doors open with both hands full, but he managed somehow with the tip of his toes. He placed the soul down on the matt in the middle of the floor and went to his kitchen to prepare a soothing ointment. He came back to find they hadn’t moved or attempted an escaped, merely shifting here and there like a squirming worm to find a position that didn’t hurt.

Unfortunately this wouldn’t be possible until Ryan completely freed them of the cursed bandages.

Knelt down next to them, he got to work on their legs first and carefully cut the pieces free. Inside his house it was easier to say the word and enchant his blade, his magic much stronger here. The soul continued to cry out at first, muffled through the cloth in their mouth, until they seemed to realise the pain wouldn’t be ending any time soon. Ryan tried to be as gentle as he could without cutting down on speed. He got through the legs, chest, and arms in no time and remained surprised when they left them by their sides as he reached up to work on their neck. Maybe the pain and magic were still too strong.

A flash from outside and the thunder crackled above them. With it came the pitter-patter of droplets on his roof that filled in the void of silence in his house.

He’d been correct about their clothes, a shirt now riddled with larges holes and a pair of trousers stiff with dirt and blood. Ryan had nothing of the right size in his wardrobe but maybe some loose clothing was what they would need right now.

He cut the cloth from their mouth first and moved the spit drenched piece to one side. Dry blood had collected at the sides of their lips. Cutting the gathering knot on the side of their head, he managed to get the rest of the pieces off their head in one go.

They blinked a few times when the cloth had finally been removed from their eyes, staring only up at the ceiling.

Ryan turned away to get the ointment and turned back to find a knife at his throat.

The soul glared at him, wide eyed.

He slowly raised his hands. ‘My name is Ryan Bergara,’ he said. ‘It’s okay, you’re safe now.’ When they still didn’t relent, he added, ‘I’m here to help.’

Something flashed across their gaze. They were afraid, understandably. ‘Why did you cut me down?’

‘Because I wanted to help,’ Ryan said. ‘I’m a guardian spirit, helping others is my nature. I could sense your fear and your danger and so I came to see what I could do.’

They searched his face for something and eventually seemed to find what they were looking for. They lowered the knife.

‘I’m Ryan, what’s your name?’ he asked, letting them keep the knife for now if it made them feel safe.

‘Shane Madej,’ they said, mumbling to their hunched-up knees.

‘Okay, Shane, if you lie back, I can apply an ointment that will ease up your pain,’ Ryan said and held up the bowl of cream to show Shane.

He eyed it for a moment and then nodded. Gingerly lying back down, he kept a strong grip on the knife, however, and didn’t take his eyes off Ryan’s hands as he scooped up a small smudge.

Shane jumped at the first touch of cream so Ryan rubbed it in slowly, with delicate dabs of his fingers. The cloth had already started to leave red lines on every surface of skin. He did a several spots on his legs and chest. When it came to his hands, Ryan gently took the knife from Shane, throwing a glance up at his eyes to gage his reaction, before putting it to one side.

Shane seemed understanding in its removal but Ryan couldn’t be sure.

He did each of his hands, extra careful on the palms, and then moved up to Shane’s face. He didn’t touch his mouth directly and Shane closed his eyes as he travelled over his forehead.

Finished, Ryan sat back on his knees. This man needed a bath and some fresh clothes but he would wait a little while for the ointment to settle into the skin first. That way it would keep working for a bit after he washed.

‘Why were you up in that tree?’ Ryan said.

Shane popped one eye open and shifted his body in a way that clearly indicated he wanted to lie on one side. After Ryan thought he wouldn’t answer, he said, ‘it wasn’t a tree. It was a shrine. The locals decided to pay their respects and some bastard used it as an opportunity to try to shut me up for good.’

‘Why?’

Shane merely looked at him this time, then turned his head away.

Leaving it there, Ryan got up and took his bowl to the kitchen for cleaning. He closed the shutter door to give Shane a moment of privacy.

The rain strengthened outside, pounding against the side of the house, and the wind shook its insides. Ryan rinsed off the bowl and left it to dry before heading into his bathroom. He flipped on the tap and watched the water fill the bathtub. Resting on the rim, he thought to himself.

Shane was clearly a demon. Only demons were powerful enough to get caught inside shrines, rather than simply die. A powerful form of ancient magic that broke down the barrier between this world and the next, allowing someone else to throw him into the mess in the middle. They meant well when they did it, but the humans had no idea what chaos they aided the cause of when a demon wanted to twist it for their own personal sadistic gain. But then what else were they for?

Demon or not, Ryan still wanted to help him. He was someone in pain and he would use his magic to stop that and anyone else like it until the day he no longer could.

Right now Shane was scared and hurt. He needed rest and time to get back on his feet again. What he chose to do after that Ryan would take the appropriate action to deal with.

Steam drifted up from the tub once it had filled. Ryan flipped off the tap and consulted his wardrobe for any clothes that would possibly fit Shane. Someone needed to be blind not to accept the rather large size difference between them.

In the end he picked out the loosest robe he owed and the large trousers he accidentally bought a few sizes too big and then forgot to return. Folding them up, he placed them in a pile near the bath and returned to Shane.

He remained exactly where Ryan had left him, except now sat up. Like a dog hearing their name, he tilted his head Ryan’s way when the shutter door slid open but other than that stayed still.

Ryan walked around over to him. ‘I’ve run you a bath and managed to find some clothes that might fit you since,’ pointing to Shane’s chest, ‘I’m sure there’s not much we can do for that now.’

After a long silence, Shane finally stood up and only now did Ryan truly see how much taller he was than him, nearly a whole head so. Shane’s lips curved in a weak smile. ‘I have nothing to give you,’ he said, sad.

‘Uh, I have nothing to want from you,’ Ryan said and Shane’s face dissolved into something he couldn’t quite read, not fully negative but not entirely positive either. ‘Please,’ he tried again, ‘wash and change, it will make you feel better. I’ll see if I can’t rustle up something decent to eat.’

‘Ryan Bergara,’ Shane said. Names were important to demons and he said Ryan’s with a soft breath as if he meant in deep worship to him. He approached Ryan and the smile on his lips relaxed somewhat, like it had found an easier way to exist on his face. ‘Thank you.’

Ryan couldn’t fight the warm contentment within him. He grinned, giddy from it. ‘You’re welcome, Shane Madej.’

He led Shane into the bathroom, watching him sit on the rim and test the water for a moment before signalling his retreat with the promise of a hot meal for Shane when he’d finished.

The demon said his name and thanked him again.

¬

Ryan stupidly only had a few bits and pieces in his fridge for a simple meal of boiled eggs and rice. Making a mental note to visit the market when this storm subsided, he stirred his rice and settled into the new atmosphere of the house.

Any supernatural beings within proximity of each other was enough to surge up a little magic, especially one nearly at the origin of one of his strongest power sources and one daggling on the edge from tribulations of fear and pain. Something electric hung in the air and Ryan breathed it in like scented smoke.

Only the awkward sudden slide of the shutter door behind brought him back to reality. He turned to see Shane dressed in his clothes, hair still damp. Faint red lines coated his flushed pink skin and Ryan wondered how long they might take to fade, if they would even fade at all.

Shane stood by the door, clearly unsure what to do and Ryan, giving the rice a checking glance, offered him spot by the table in the corner. Shane kneeled down and instantly looked rather out of place. His thighs rested a bit too high for the table. He couldn’t fit them under it, which meant he was then positioned too far away to reach anything on it without bending unceremoniously forward.

Ryan tried not to smile to avoid coming off rude.

But Shane beat him to it and seemed very self-aware. ‘This part of the world loves to remind me how big my form is, I swear.’

‘It would have a habit of doing that, yes,’ Ryan said. He returned to his rice before he forgot about it.

‘Your bath was very appreciated and your food smells highly appetising,’ Shane called over.

‘I’m glad to hear that,’ Ryan said, grin back on his lips. A few more stirs indicated the rice was done. He spooned a good scoop or three into bowls and after, slicing them in half, darted the hard-boiled eggs on top.

He walked back over to the table and placed the bowl down in front of Shane. ‘I admit my supplies are running kinda thin,’ he said, settling down opposite him. ‘I should make a visit to the market when this storm subsides.’

‘Sorry for that,’ Shane said gaze down as he picked up his bowl and began to fiddle with his food. ‘I wondered if this weather was because of me.’

‘It’s the fault of whoever hurt you,’ Ryan said, defiant. ‘No one else.’

His head popped up and Shane’s features produced that ambiguous expression once more, contorting the flushed lines on his face. He kept his thank you silent and returned to his food.

They ate in relative quiet, the only sounds those of the wind and rain outside. The thunder must have wondered off earlier, other than when he first brought Shane in, Ryan hadn’t heard much of it since. He made another mental note to go check his protective spells set up around the property. Although they must have been working to some extent or else he would have had a problem by now.

Shane finished before him and placed his bowl gently down on the table. He sat back on his knees and twiddled with his fingers.

‘Do you need any more ointment?’ Ryan asked.

Shane raised his eyebrows. ‘Huh?' 

‘For your wounds? Would you like me apply any more ointment?’

Looking to his lap, Shane raised his arms in a way that caused the sleeves to fall back away from them. ‘I don’t think there’s much that can be done for them now,’ he said gloomily.

Ryan didn’t need to be endowed with magic the way he was to sense the anguish coming off of Shane right now. But it certainly helped.

When finished himself, he collected their bowls and brought them to the sink. Shane didn’t stay down by the floor and rose up to join him. Ryan pondered over what he wanted until he finished with the first bowl and Shane took it from the drainer, drying it off and putting it on the counter top. He did that with everything Ryan handed him.

With quite the collection before him, he looked to Ryan sheepishly, ‘sorry, I don’t know where anything goes.’

Ryan smiled. ‘As you shouldn’t, understandably.’ He pulled open a few of the cupboard doors and plopped everything back in its place. Glancing back, he caught Shane rubbing a hand over the wounds on the other arm, massaging his fingers in the gaps. ‘You sure about that ointment?’ he asked.

Shane considered his offer and nodded this time. ‘A little more might be good,’ he said.

‘It’s no problem. Come on,’ Ryan said. Taking Shane back into the first room, he instructed him to sit down while he got the ointment.

He came back to find Shane had loosened the knot at his stomach so now the robes hung open around his chest, easy to presume because the fabric irritated his still-sensitive wounds.

Ryan kneeled down opposite and asked first for the hand he’d been rubbing at. He put on a generous amount and moved to other arm.

After that he tentatively reached out to touch on Shane’s chest and, when he didn’t attempt to stop him, began to work the ointment across the skin there. Shane signed deeply as the soothing magic took effect. Working up to the neck, he leaned down as Ryan started on his face.

Shane closed his eyes and gave another long sigh.

‘The pain should fade now the bandages have been removed,’ Ryan said in reassurance. ‘Until then the ointment will do a good job.’

Shane let him finish before speaking. His eyes drawn down to the arm he’d been fiddling with earlier, although the massaging appeared less insistent this time. He liked to look down a lot. ‘You’re a distinctly kind soul, Ryan,’ he said, ‘and you don’t even know me.’

Ryan needed a moment to adjust to the sudden boost of warmth rushing through his body, like liquid gold in his old veins. Helping people was something he naturally did as a guardian but it never got old and he loved that. Rising with a grin on his face, ‘I don’t have to know you to be able to help,’ he said.

‘Evidently so,’ Shane said simply. He looked up at Ryan and the red lines on his face softened under his smile. ‘I’ve said it so many times today but, thank you.’

After a couple of hours, the storm subsided. Ryan went out to check perimeter and see if the magic set up still worked correctly. The sunlight peeked in through the grey clouds and everything had a thin layer of moisture to it meaning it all sparkled and shone. His nose crinkled as he squinted out across the scene.

Ryan took advantage of the calm to head out and visit the market while Shane rested. The many market goers and traders were still recovering from the sudden downfall of water, shaking off droplets and emptying their drooping overhangs. Every person he met would not stop commenting on the massive storm that had been raging and how they hadn’t seen anything like it in long while.

Most busy dealing with that, Ryan collected everything he needed in no time at all. Now he even had some time to choose a little extra. He found something sweet for Shane in the hopes it would settle his stomach and generally make this whole terrible event easier to swallow.

¬

Ryan awoke not to a noise but a feeling. A presence of something unwelcome in his home. He laid there for a full minute, listening out for any signs of a physical location. But all he got was silence. 

With one hand, he sat up on the matt to check instead if he could see anything. He whispered the word and, in a few blinks, his eyes could see hazily through the walls of his house. Moonlight bled in from the window in the hallway casting silhouettes of his furniture. Shane laid asleep on a bed a few rooms over, still recovering. Nothing other than that out of place.

Several enchantments laid dormant around his house and some on the land beyond, but he wasn’t one of the strongest in their world and anyone of the supernatural could always have found a way to get past them. The magical spectrum stretched out further and wider than Ryan properly comprehended on occasions.

The presence changed in intensity but not quantity, almost like they grew in consistency rather than moved closer. He narrowed his eyes and drew his focus to try and spot any movement out there on the other side of the walls.

A shiver ran down his spine, however, when he realised the shape by the door wasn’t one of his coats hanging off the back. It possessed a pair of legs.

Ryan didn’t waste any time; he dashed for his knife in the dresser across the room. With a tremendous crash, the door to his bedroom collapsed inwards. A flash of silver cut through the air and sliced his outreached arm.

Ryan yelped and tried to jump back but another hand darted forward in time to grab his throat. Before he could even process the effect of the magic on the blade, it took a hold of his senses, stabbing his sinuses and causing his eyes to suddenly water. That mixed with the intruder’s quick movements in the dark meant he couldn’t apprehend another thought as he was picked up and chucked across the room.

Landing against the wall, he got winded instantly.

‘A guardian spirit helping a demon is this a fairytale,’ a voice in between the rushing blood of his head said. ‘Well I suppose it is in your nature to help _anyone_.’

The sound of footsteps across the room indicated the figure was advancing on him. He needed to get up and get away or fight, he needed to do something but Ryan couldn’t move. The magic made his eyes water more and more, the tears overflowing and pouring down his cheeks, his nose hurt and he really wanted to burst out crying. The magic certainly did its work. He was scared right now; unable to stop this person from getting away with doing whatever they wanted.

As the figure stepped up in front, Ryan looked up at them.

‘And, indeed, money can always help in winning you over.’

Then abruptly they got yanked backwards by something. He watched Shane grab them with two glowing red hands. The magic danced from his fingers like fire and spread throughout the figure, illuminating the room with flickering light. They screamed in pain before bursting into flames and their physical form crumbled away like dust.

His house returned to silence.

Shane appeared at Ryan’s side immediately and wiped at new tears coming from his eyes, presumably to help him see but it didn’t work. The magic was very potent. He took up the arm that had been cut and Ryan desperately wanted to fall into him as the magic made him feel more and more upset.

Ryan whimpered and wiped his nose with back of his hand. The wound stung a lot at even the slightest movement. He wore a short sleeved pajama top so at least didn’t have to worry about damage or blood on his clothes. ‘I don’t—’ his voice cracked, ‘I don’t know how to make it stop.’

‘Hold still, Ryan, it’s okay,’ Shane said and his voice, deep from sleep, filled Ryan’s ears. ‘They’re gone now you’re safe.’

Not dead gone, but forced somewhere else and gone from his house.

‘Just let me…’ Shane cupped the cut with his hand and from it spread a soft warmth that continued on throughout Ryan’s whole body.

It finished when it reached his face, stopping the tears and relaxing the sharp tension behind his nose. He collected himself in the calm that followed. ‘Thank you,’ he said.

‘Are you alright? Are you hurt anywhere else, I mean?’ Shane said, eyes still concerned.

‘I—I’m fine.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Yeah,’ Ryan said, insisting although he understood why Shane felt the need to be so worried. ‘Are _you_ okay?’

Shane glanced back to the pile of black dust now on the floor, the only evidence left of a banishment back to Hell. ‘I think so,’ he said.

Returned to his senses, Ryan could properly observe the damage. The wall near the door had been smashed in as well and his dresser look to have been punched, various clothes spilling out onto the carpet. ‘Shane, who was that?’ he said.

Shane helped him up with a firm grip on his forearm. ‘One of the more prominent demons who trapped me in that shrine,’ he said. ‘They must have found I’d escaped and come looking to try again. Trust Tinsley to be the only one to give a shit like that.’

‘One of..? Does that mean more are gonna come?’ Ryan asked.

‘Possibly, but not tonight. Not after I banished the worst one away,’ he said. He squeezed the hand still on Ryan’s arm. ‘If they do, I will keep you safe, Ryan Bergara.’ A full name, a true promise.

Ryan nodded. Shane stayed to help him shift the debris shards off his matt for him to be able to go back to sleep. The rest of this mess would have to be dealt with fully in the morning.

¬

Shane seemed determined to stick around until he was absolutely sure Ryan would be safe. So Ryan made it his mission to get to know the man that would be sharing a roof with him for an unforeseeable future. Shane also insisted on partaking in the repairs of his home – after all the intruder had showed up because of him – and often they spent a good day in the coming weeks sat in Ryan’s bedroom, putting together furniture and deconstructing his door to place up a new one.

Ryan didn’t wish to seem predisposed and he knew demons could be eccentric but Shane was something else. The man took it all to a whole nother level, in fact.

As a more relaxed person in his presence, a very wacky side of Shane revealed itself. He would move differently, in odd jerky movements that Ryan eventually realised was his attempt at dancing to the music they heard on his old radio. He would find the little details of stories Ryan’s stories just the right amount of funny and they found they could disappear into humourous bits quite easily, both staying in character until a perfect conclusion.

He would announce random dumb events he had done out of the blue. ‘I fell asleep in my car by accident once,’ he said during the silence that had formed from concentrating on correctly screwing the nails into Ryan’s new dresser.

‘Yeah, how?’

‘I was drunk and just wanted to drive but quickly became aware enough that I knew I shouldn’t, so I got in the back seat instead of the front.’

Ryan snorted. ‘That’s a way to do it, I suppose,’ he said, laughing while he held two planks of wood together at the corner.

‘Sitting down, I realised how sleep I was and laid down there on the back seat,’ Shane continued, ‘I then remembered in my drunken logic to lock the doors so no one would get at me. I woke up rather confused the next day about why I was where I was.’

‘I can imagine.’

Shane finished his current screw and bent around to retrieve the next. ‘My friends found it rather funny.’

‘I do too.’ Ryan grinned in that way he found always made Shane smile.

Unfortunately as their time together stretched on, it revealed a saddening truth. No matter what Ryan found or tried, nothing could make the scars on Shane’s body go away. After the eight day of trying, Shane pushed his hand aside and asked him to focus his energy on something else, defeated. The magical torture received from that shrine had been too powerful to reverse and Shane would now have to accept this was his body.

Ryan wished he could find some way to help him with this verdict, but alas, only Shane could help himself adjust to it fully.

The weeks grew longer and they spent increasing time together. Enough time that Ryan finally felt comfortable to ask one night during dinner, ‘Shane?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Why did those demons put you in that shrine?’

Shane froze and his face fell. He finished the last remnants of his meal and put the bowl down on the table before him. His face went through series of emotions and he didn’t look at Ryan when he said, ‘they were a group of lower Hell demons and they put me in the shrine because they couldn’t do that to someone else.’

Ryan ignored the stab of panic that flooded through him and let Shane have his chance to explain. He didn’t have full knowledge of the societies within Hell but he knew one thing for sure, demons valued their rules and their balanced society.

‘Recently,’ Shane said, ‘a friend of mine found a way to take away her immortality. She sacrificed a lot to make that decision and even more going through with it but, in the end, anyone could only agree, it was her choice to make.’ He struggled with his emotions once more and Ryan watched his bottom lip quiver. ‘A few demons disagreed with her, however. And most of them seemed to mind their own by it. Except for this one small group that _always_ hated us, you know?’ That demon Shane had mentioned before, Tinsley.

Ryan understood unexplainable childhood bullies. Some people just always needed the degradation of other people to make themselves feel good and if one had no way of moving away from them, that resentment could easily carry on through into adulthood.

‘They found that they couldn’t hurt Sara the way they wanted. Magic doesn’t work the same on mortal bodies, it’s too powerful a blow and they didn’t want her dead because that would be too boring. But they could still hurt me and, with no way of preventing it, she would be hurt as a result.’

What Shane spoke of made sense. If they threw a mortal body into shrine, it would be overwhelmed by the power before the person even felt anything, a quick and painless death. But with a demon, they would be left with the most painful of fates. Had Ryan not come along, Shane would have died there, very slowly. And his friend Sara would be defenceless to free him without her magic. Those demons wanted to torture both of them in separate ways.

Shane, a demon left to rot in lonely, icy world with no one to save him but Ryan. The scars of which now littered his entire body.

‘The ropes had already been slightly cut, by the time I got there,’ Ryan said, ‘was that your friend?’

Shane shrugged. ‘Possibly,’ he said, solemn.

‘Why don’t you ask her? Find out?’

Shane didn’t respond. Instead he picked his bowl up in silence and took it to the sink.

Ryan left his bowl on the table and followed him over. ‘Why?’ he said, needing an answer to this. ‘Are they preventing you from doing that, these other demons? Cause I can help if that's the case.’

Shane shook his head, gaze still away. ‘No, they are not.’

‘Then why don’t you go see her?’ Ryan couldn’t understand his aloofness, he wasn’t preventing Shane from leaving in any way. He appreciated having someone around again but wouldn’t have qualms if he packed up and left right tonight. He had helped him in every way he could, the only remaining recovery resided in Shane now and, of course, after all a guest was a guest.

‘Because you’re in danger,’ Shane blurted out and both of them shared a look like they knew he had jumped to the first conclusion he could find.

‘I’ll always be in danger,’ Ryan said, putting it there. ‘That’s a fact of existing. And no offence but if you left, I could see my chances of being visited by those demons again lowering drastically. So why are you still here?’

Shane pursed his lips, desperate to keep them together and keep quiet.

‘What do you want, Shane Madej?’ Ryan knew Shane had to answer if he said his name and he looked to Ryan with pleading eyes. ‘Clearly something must be keeping you here, so what is it?’ he said. ‘Do you feel some obligation after all the help I’ve given, is that it?’

Shane hummed oddly, not that. The air around them swirled like a drop of dye in disturbed water.

‘Is it the other way around then? You saved my life. If there’s something you desire in return for that, I can give it to you. Whatever it is. Anything.’

Shane turned to face him fully. But something akin to shame hung heavy on his shoulders and he couldn’t look at Ryan for a long minute. When he finally did, his eyes were glowing a deep red. They matched his pinkish scars. ‘What if what I want is _you_?’ he said, so quiet it almost came out as a whisper.

Ryan’s breath caught in his throat and the walls creaked as if sucking in air with him. ‘I… I said anything, didn’t I?’

Shane’s eyes went wide, he hadn’t expected that answer in the slightest. Could he really think after all they had been through that him being a demon or his weirdness or even something as harmless as a bunch of scars on his body could make him in any way undesirable to Ryan?

The air snapped. Without another word, Shane advanced on him. Ryan, caught in a fight or flight rush, backed away until he bumped into the kitchen counter behind. Nowhere left to go, Shane crowded up into Ryan’s space and his hands went not to his face, but to top buttons on Ryan’s shirt. He had it done right up to the chin whereas Shane liked to keep little number he had open, almost down to the middle of his chest. It had been driving Ryan wild.

His heartbeat grew faster and faster as each button popped open, hands gripped the counter surface top until the knuckles went white. Shane got them undone enough to open the front of his shirt, exposing his chest.

‘One moment, please.’ Abruptly he gripped Ryan’s shoulders and the tingles of magic floated up around them. They transformed into a collection of black smoke, travelling hastily across the house where Shane reformed them laying down on Ryan’s bedroom matt, Shane on top.

Teleportation magic usually left Ryan a dizzy mess and his head spun now suddenly in a horizontal position. Grabbing onto Shane, Shane seemed to get the picture and they both waited a moment for him to regain his balance.

Shane stroked a gentle hand along Ryan’s hairline and lulled him back towards a less hazy state. Next he smoothed his palms over Ryan’s stomach and up his chest, pushing his shirt all the way open. His weight rested nicely on top of Ryan and everywhere he touched felt warm. Mixed with his already building adrenaline, it burned good.

Shuffling down his body, Shane’s hands reached his pants, where Ryan was nearly half hard inside. Shane palmed him, testing the waters.

Giving him exactly what he wanted, Ryan squirmed and wiggled against the touch. He sighed when Shane paused and started it again at the bottom, rubbing him up and down until he was fully hard.

Shane gave three small kisses along his bare stomach as a brief indication before he pulled Ryan out of his pants and took him into his mouth.

The burning became electric. Ryan shoved a hand in Shane’s soft hair and words slipped from his mouth of their own accord, ‘shit, fuck.’ He arched up against him and spread his legs as wide as he could in the current circumstances.

Shane hummed encouragingly. One hand slid up Ryan’s chest to rest over his heart, the other massaging the sensitive parts on the back of his thigh.

Ryan shot his head side to side as the tension built in his belly. ‘Shane…’ he said on exhale, only way to warn him before he reached climax.

Shane kept moving through it, almost too much, and then pulled away to immediately crawl up him. He took both of Ryan's hands and pinned them down by the wrist either side of his head. A second later, he leaned in and kissed him.

Ryan tilted up to meet him half way. He hadn’t been kissed or touched this way in a long time. He could even feel a light trace of the scars in the corners of Shane’s mouth.

Eventually something hard pressed into the joint of his leg and hip and Ryan couldn’t even remember the point when he’d see Shane undress himself. Shane began to thrust his hips against him and deepened the kiss.

Ryan wanted to help out but he struggled to shift into a good angle for Shane on account of the fact he couldn’t looked down. Shane kept him locked in the kiss, pushing deeper and deeper into his mouth. He squeezed his pinned wrists on the sweet side of painful and even though Ryan had already come, something sparkled in him once more. Ryan felt possessed, all he could smell and feel and taste was Shane.

The kissing gradually turned sloppy and desperate. Shane was close. He gave a few more purposeful thrusts. Groaning into Ryan’s mouth as he spilled out onto the carpet. Their lips popped a part with a click and Shane dropped his head in the crook of Ryan’s shoulder to breathe.

Ryan was breathing heavy as well. His wrists freed, he ran a hand into Shane’s soft hair. He liked the way it felt through his fingers, the strands tickling in the gaps, and only realised he’d been stroking nicely back and forth, when Shane gave a low pleased hum.

Shane pulled back to rest on an arm, his eyes still glowing red and Ryan imagined his own body had a gentle glow to it from his loss of control on his magic. The features on Shane’s face grew around his smile and he cupped Ryan’s cheek.

Ryan found himself grinning uncontrollable as they shared a long gaze, before Shane needed to shift into a more comfortable position and spotted his marking on the carpet.

‘Ah, yeah… let me clean that up,’ he said, going to pull away.

But Ryan grabbed at him. ‘Shane, we’ll worry about it later,’ he said.

‘Okay,’ Shane said. He relaxed back onto Ryan’s body and the matt below.

Ryan moved his hand to where Shane’s shirt had come loose away from his chest at the top and he slipped under the fabric to feel more of Shane’s skin. Shane shuffled about in response and at first Ryan thought he found it too ticklish. But eventually his hand came up to stop Ryan completely.

Taking his own hand back, Ryan put it down near Shane’s shoulder to give him some space for the moment. ‘I wanna see you,’ he said, reassuring.

‘Oh you do now?’ Shane retorted in a joking tone, clearly trying to defuse his awkwardness. He got caught in Ryan’s persistent gaze, however, yet couldn’t meet it for long. Fiddling around with the last button on the shirt, he thought for a long second. ‘Okay,’ he said eventually to his hand.

Shane remained hesitant for a few more seconds before letting go of his shirt and moving back onto his knees. He undid the last button and pulled the shirt up over his shoulders.

Ryan brought his hands up and placed them on Shane’s body as he laid back down with him. He ran his fingers over the many lines and dips on Shane’s chest, feeling each light marking and crevice. The cursed ropes hadn’t scarred deeper than the surface of the skin but they had left something Shane certainly couldn’t ignore. Ryan continued up, travelling upwards to Shane’s shoulder and down on his back towards the largest group of scars, where the knot keeping him on the tree had resided.

Shane closed his eyes to Ryan’s examination, possibly to calm his nerves. They breathed together for a while and when Shane opened them again, the smile he gave glowed warm and true.

Ryan easily grinned back.

¬

Surprisingly, it was rather easy for them to fall into a semi-domestic environment. Shane had already been sharing the load with chores around the house to make up for Ryan’s gratitude, cooking and cleaning. Therefore, taking away the reasoning behind all that didn’t change much.

However, deciding to stay together for now meant that they had to take in mind the potential return of those demons. Shane spent several days setting up his best protective glyphs around the house. These traps meant it wouldn’t be as smooth for him to come and go from the property as to avoid getting trapped in them himself, but that was worth the effort to keep them both safe.

Yet even with all that, they didn’t take in mind how patience these demons were willing to be, or how tenacious. They really wanted to fuck up Shane’s life, didn’t they?

On the day, Ryan woke alone, Shane having gone to the market already to get breakfast. He got up and dressed and put on his boots by the door to head out into the yard. The broom rested in its usual spot and he took it with one hand to begin sweeping the vast space of dirt and leaves.

At first, Ryan spotted the shadow and, in a shitty twist, spun around to meet the knife that got plunged into his stomach. The pain like getting his hand jammed in a door but much sharper and spreading out from his centre with no end.

The demon holding on at the other end grinned darkly, their body still part smoke. He recognised them from the night he got attacked, Tinsley Shane had called him. ‘What’s the point of putting up traps, if you show us how to avoid them every day?’ Tinsley said. ‘I guess you didn’t know what’s good for you. We warned you to keep off.’

Ryan always figured blood would feel hot rushing up his throat, but like this it came out cold. Choking, he coughed some onto his shirt. The knife got removed in a firm yank and the coldness also spread from its puncture. The pain gone now only to be replaced with a numbness. He just about remembered to push down on the wound in his increasingly hazy state and, oh, that’s where the pain went.

‘The job’s done, one stab like she said, let’s go,’ the other demon said and grabbed Tinsley’s arm. ‘I don’t wanna be here when Shane shows up.’

Tinsley nodded and they both darted down the yard, their clunking footsteps echoing off the stone like banging drums.

It had all happened so fast that Ryan could even remember their faces. He tried to stay on his feet for as long as possible but the fatigue overtook him and he flopped down to the ground, broom forgotten. His limbs grew suddenly so heavy and it took all the effort he possessed to crawl along the ground. But he needed to get to the wall at the end of the yard, somewhere vertical to rest up against.

Tears blurred his vision. Shane had made an oath to protect him and it had failed. But maybe it wasn’t so much on Shane’s broken promises and perhaps on something stronger than magic that had sealed Ryan’s fate. As the blood spewed out between his fingers, he realised he felt like he’d found a home in Shane and now his tragic destiny would come true. Turned out the old saying he’d been told time and time again found a way to play out.

He only hoped he would make it before Shane arrived to at least be able to say goodbye.

Shuffling painfully up to the stone wall, he collapsed against it and waited there in the peace of the morning for Shane to come home. It seemed like the longest wait of his life.

But eventually Shane’s odd heavy footfalls echoed up into the yard. He abandoned his basket of food on the dirty floor the second he spotted the blood trail and Ryan. Rushing up to his side, Shane drew him into his arms and Ryan groaned from the new movement.

Shane didn’t stop. He lifted him up and cradled him, hugged him to his chest. ‘They did this to you because of me, I’m so sorry, Ryan, I’m so sorry,’ he said, eyes staining red. He took over pushing down on the wound. But the blood that had already left his body said enough.

‘It’s okay… okay, I forgive you-u.’ Using all the strength he had left, Ryan raised a hand up to Shane’s face. He accidentally got blood on his cheek, should have used the other one. ‘I think… I think I’m in love with you, Shane Madej,’ he said.

Shane’s face twisted in pain and the tears in his eyes welled up anew.

Ryan smiled, happy to know the last face he would see would be his. He closed his eyes and drifted into the darkness, lost from this world in the arms of love. Shane rested his forehead against him and Ryan nuzzled up into the last drop of warmth.

He could have been mistaken but the warmth coming from Shane seemed to grow and expand. It must have been the blood loss confusing him and distorting his remaining sense. He had no strength left to open his eyes to check the truth, though.

The world fell out from under him, suspended in a void, the heat grew stronger and stronger and soon Ryan burned in unimaginable flames. A golden warmth softer than anything he’d ever felt. The fire engulfed his body and then his soul.

Until finally everything faded to nothing.

Ryan opened his eyes and immediately that didn’t feel right. He was in clean room lying on a bed. He’d been dressed in new clothes and a sore patch throbbed on odd spots around his body, his forehead and further down on his chest, one shoulder.

Groaning, he went to sit up and disturbed the person sat across from him.

They jumped up, immediately alert. ‘Shane-- shit! Shane, he’s awake!’ they said, calling into the other room.

Ryan looked around at his new surroundings and became immensely confused, which just kept growing worse. If this was the afterlife, it appeared a lot warmer and brighter than he expected.

The door to the room opened. In walked in a small woman with pale-pink skin and curly, brunette hair, and following close behind her was Shane Madej.

Ryan couldn’t contain his excitement. ‘Shane..?’ he said, the name leaving his lips against his will.

Shane seemed to share the sentiment and darted to the bedside. He settled for crouching next to the bed since it appeared the quickest way to be near him, ‘hi, how do you feel?’ He raised a hand to cup his cheek and Ryan leaned into the touch.

‘I don’t… I don’t understand,’ he said, and looked to Shane and the other two members in the room. ‘What happened?’

‘You died,’ Shane said. ‘And I was so scared. I didn’t know what to do and I didn’t know what happened. But then the thought just came to me.’ He took a firm breath. ‘I burned away my immortality to give you your life back.’

‘You burned it away…?’

‘You’re both mortal now,’ the first one he’d seen in the room said.

‘Welcome to the club,’ the woman said, stood next to them. ‘It’s still rather small though...’ she cocked her head,’ and doesn’t come with that many perks.’

Shane let go of his face and turned his body to face the others. He threw a hand towards the woman, ‘Ryan, this is Sara, the friend I told you about,’ he gestured to the taller person with curly black hair, ‘and this is Eugene.’

Eugene gave a wave. ‘Hi.’

‘Hey, Ryan,’ Sara said. ‘This giant lug has literally not stopped talking about what you did for him, it’s almost getting past the point of cute.’

A light blushed coloured Shane’s cheeks. ‘You should be safe here,’ he said, drawing Ryan’s attention back to him. They shared a smile, but then Shane looked down, his body language becoming even more self-conscious, ‘Ryan, there’s one other thing...’

‘Oh?’

‘To do what I did,’ he said, ‘I _literally_ burned away a piece of myself and the flames may have left something on you,’ Shane’s eyes widened when he looked up to see Ryan’s face. ‘I-I’m sorry, you’ve been out for over a month and we tried everything we could to get rid of the burns but… nothing worked.’

‘Show me,’ Ryan said and after a nervous glance at the others, Shane helped him out of the bed while Eugene moved away from the mirror in the corner.

A clear distinct burn mark, bumpy and scrunched up, on the cleaner side of being healed, stretched out from the width of half across his forehead to barely a millimetre before his hair line on his face. It reached down far enough that he only had one eyebrow left.

‘There’s others on your body,’ Shane said, not meeting his eye in the mirror. ‘You might be able to feel them, they’re probably still sore.’

Shane had taken away his magic, his duty as a guardian spirit, and his immortality, all while scarring him in the process, but ‘I don’t care,’ Ryan said. The saying had been true. He’d travelled the whole world over for centuries, but by finding a home in Shane, Ryan’s journey as an immortal had come to an end. An ending, however, didn’t mean his life had to be over too.

‘What?’ Shane looked at him, eyes hopeful. ‘You can be angry at me, I—’

‘Why would I be angry?’ Ryan turned to him. ‘You saved me and I love you and I’m happy. This,’ he gestured to his face, ‘doesn’t matter. It’s a _thing_ but it’s not what’s important to me in the long run. Just how I think yours don’t matter either.’

Shane smiled and took Ryan’s face in his hands. ‘I love you too,’ he said.

It abruptly hit him what he’d just confessed. But the only thing he felt after all was more happiness. Ryan pushed forward into Shane’s embraced and kissed him.

‘Ew, guys, stop,’ Eugene said, but he was joking.

They both pulled a part giggling.

‘Come on, big guy,’ Sara said. Hand on her hips, she headed for the door. ‘We have lunch to make.’

‘Can I help?’ Ryan asked.

‘You should probably rest for now,’ Shane said. ‘Sleep it off.’

‘You’ve probably got another whole month of recovery, buddy,’ Eugene said.

Ryan nodded, respecting that they would know more about all this than him. Shane helped him back into the bed. ‘See you on the other side, Shane Madej,’ he said.

Shane leaned in and kissed him on the forehead, right near his new scar. ‘You too, Ryan Bergara.’

They all left the room and switched off the light on the way out. Ryan rolled onto his side and shut his eyes, trying to find a position he could be comfortable in.

During the lulling last moments of consciousness, he tried to piece together this new mountain collection of thoughts. He wouldn’t get through it all before falling asleep, but he had the days ahead to do so.

One thing stuck out, for sure, though. Never in all his years would he have imagined ending up here, in the state he was now. He’d been warned to keep away from Shane from the very beginning, but it was always strange what desire would make the foolish do, and Ryan found he liked being foolish because helping others always remained very worth the sacrifice.

**Author's Note:**

> uuuuuuuuuuhhhh, yeah, no matter how hard i try i always feel like what i've written isn't enough, so if you get that sense towards the end.... it's probably why ~~and i also couldn't read it through without wanting to die, so don't think it's bad to point out any grammars mistakes or whatnot for me~~
> 
> i still had fun with this though, tfw you randomly write an 8k fic out of the blue & almost forget the cool plot point you put in the middle of it lol, and the artwork inspiration helped also :3


End file.
